High school acquaintance asks 27-year-old woman if she can have her old food stamps now that she doesn't qualify for them anymore, gets angry when she declines: 'She told me I was being stingy and privileged now that I have a job'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
May 14, 2025 8:00 AM EDT

I hate it when someone thinks they can have something of yours just because you aren't using it. I don't go snooping around in my roommate's closet, looking at her clothes, thinking, "Wow, Audrey hasn't worn this in a long time. I wonder if I can keep it." 

We are taught from a very young age to value sharing, but as we grow older, our willingness and desire to share keeps shrinking. You go from "you have to share your toys, otherwise you're not a good person" to "income taxes need to be abolished" within 60 years of living. Of course, both of those examples are pretty fringe, but I think it's a fair assessment to say that most people don't like being told what they can and can't do with their stuff. We have so little in this life, we should at least have some say in what happens to our possessions. 

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  • The woman in this story is not only acting entitled to her friend's money, but she's also acting entitled to the money that the government gave her friend when she was in need. Instead of merely congratulating her friend on getting off food stamps, she tried to take possession of the last of them.

  • 01

    Can’t believe you won’t give me your food stamps if you’re not using them

    So I (27F) have been working really hard to get my life back on track after a rough couple years. I just got a stable job, moved into a tiny studio and am finally starting to feel like I can breathe. Since my income changed, I no longer qualify for SNAP benefits (food stamps), and I let a couple of people know I'll be coming off the program.
    via u/PipeSea4959
  • 02
    Cheezburger Image 10505383424
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 03
    One girl I knew from high school messaged me out of nowhere. We haven't talked in years and she asked if I could send her my card since I don't use my food stamps anymore.
    via u/PipeSea4959
  • 04
    I informed her that it doesn't work like that because from what I know, it's illegal to give someone your card and even if it weren't, mine isn't active anymore.
    via u/PipeSea4959
  • 05
    Cheezburger Image 10505393152
    via JERO SenneGs

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 06
    She actually got mad. Told me I was being stingy and privileged now that I have a job and said I was just like everyone else who forgets where they came from.
    via u/PipeSea4959
  • 07
    TSERING ARTS Π LUMINOUS JP Desch Ka Sh Tarka PUNJABI BREAKFAST LUNCH DINNER PUNJABI Tarka Tandon DE N ORT & VIVO SKYWAYS TRAVELS A COMPLETE TRAVEL PLANNER MOBILE SHOP ACCESSORY BIKE ON RENT RECHARGE BA
    via Darshan Gajara

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 08
    I felt a rush of pain, anger and laughter at the same time but I just said ok and walked away. I'm literally still on ramen and working two jobs. I just want to survive, please.
    via u/PipeSea4959
  • 09
    I have no idea why she would say such to me while asking my help, it's not like I didn't help, I just couldn't.
    via u/PipeSea4959
  • 10
    eliz1bef That is some trashy sh. Sorry you are struggling. I hope your can start to catch up with your new job. Good luck!
    via u/eliz1bef
  • 11
    OkAdministration7456 Giving that card to someone else can result in jail time, a pretty hefty fine, and can also make you ineligible for them in the future. Tell her to go to the agency that issued you the card and ask them if it's OK.
    via u/OkAdministration7456
  • 12
    TheNinjaPixie Even though you don't qualify for stamps can you still attend any pantries or church food distribution places? Sorry the word for it just won't come into my brain. Congratulations on your new job and home!
    via u/TheNinjaPixie
  • 13
    Greenmantle22 "Forgets where they came from." This is a leper's bell of an approaching looter. It's the sort of expression one uses right before they tug on your heartstrings to demand money for nothing. What have they done to earn it? Nothing. But you're from the same town, and you knew each other as children, so that obligates you, doesn't it? GIMME-GIMME-GIMME!
    via u/Greenmantle22
  • 14
    aspdx24 That first sentence in the second paragraph was chef's kiss
    via u/aspdx24
  • 15
    Greenmantle22 I wish I could take credit, but the phrasing is actually from Ayn Rand of all people. Her original quote was "Run for your life from any man who tells you that money is evil. That sentence is the leper's bell of an approaching looter." Her argument was that money is a mere tool and an extension of one's existing moral values. Money is neither good nor evil by itself, but most people who tell you it is are only seeking to devalue it dishonestly so they can take it from you.
    via u/Greenmantle22
  • 16
    Apprehensive-Cat-111 So she thinks you'll have a card loaded up with food stamps and just will be refusing to use them?
    via u/Apprehensive-Cat-111
  • 17
    Fruitypebblefix I know this girls who's family gets EBT and has a lot of money on a card and her younger sister (19) is under the impression that she will get to have the food stamps if her mom doesn't use them and they're passed down like an inheritance and brags she won't have to work. Talk about being delusional.
    via u/Fruitypebblefix
  • 18
    EnfysMae Sadly, there are generational recipients. I've known families that no one works, mom pops out a kid every couple of years, etc. They get all sorts of financial assistance and do nothing all day. They teach their kids how to game the system. So, it just repeats with each generation.
    via u/EnfysMae
  • 19
    implodemode I've known families like this. They do under the table work and shoplift for extras. They barely get by and complain about how little money welfare gives you but, offer them a job? No thanks.
    via u/implodemode
  • 20
    PipeSea4959 OP Maybe she thought I won the lottery.
    via u/PipeSea4959
  • 21
    PlatypusDream If there's a balance on your card you can still use it. That's yours. But you're right that it's illegal to give it to anyone not in your household.
    via u/PlatypusDream
  • 22
    Jean19812 Never share detailed personal finances with anyone, even family. How does this woman even know you were on food stamps?
    via u/Jean19812
  • 23
    PipeSea4959 OP I learnt a valuable lesson from this experience. I have no idea how she knew but I'm guessing someone I told spilled
    via u/PipeSea4959
  • 24
    ShareMission There's an old spy trick, or several, to find out who. Used it at work before. The couple people you told. Tell them something else. Something that will definitely get back to you. But different stories. The story that comes back let's you know who's yapping.
    via u/ShareMission
  • 25
    Fearless-Ad-5702 Even if it *were* legal for you to give them away, I wouldn't just because she demanded them out of the blue.
    via u/Fearless-Ad-5702
  • 26
    FruitcakeAndCrumb Message her and tell her you can help her with her "financial dreams" if she joins your Mary Kay team. Explain how she'll be money if she joins in the next 24 hours and send her the same message every 7 hours but with every message Photoshop her standing next to a bigger and bigger piles of money and she absolutely will NOT message you again I'm starting to realise why I don't have friends...
    via u/FruitcakeAndCrumb
  • 27
    Ambitious-Effect6429 If I am working 2 jobs, do not ask me to be charitable. Ever. Sorry, I absolutely detested having people ask me for help when they had no job and I had 2.
    via u/Ambitious-Effect6429

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